I grew up in the suburbs. What does that make me? I'm neither a city girl nor a country girl. My husband and I have raised our children in the suburbs. We don't have cows anywhere near us, but we are surrounded by trees and creeks and our area has a rural feel to it, without the barnyard animals. However, to listen to my kids, you'd think we had brought them up in Brooklyn, New York. The last few years have opened my eyes as to how citified (is that a word?) my children have become:We took the kids to visit a friend of mine who lives about an hour away on a "hobby farm." I had never heard of the term, but I guess it means you have animals that you raise for fun, instead of for profit. They have horses, goats and chickens. My friend offered my kids the chance to gather eggs in the hen house. My kids looked at me like my friend had asked them to harvest some marijuana. They politely declined the offer and also refused to eat the eggs we were given to take home and enjoy.
Over the years, my kids have been invited to various bonfires and hayrides in the fall. They are okay with this concept, until someone offers them a stick (re: a dead tree limb) to cook a hot dog or roast a marshmallow on. You might as well be offering my kids a toilet plunger to cook their food with, because that just won't be happening with them. Sticks off trees have been peed and pooped on by insects, thank you very much!
The most obvious citification of my kids displayed itself on our family vacation out west last summer. Oh, the yarns I could spin from that. You'd have thought we took them time traveling back to the year 1880, as far as my kids were concerned. First and foremost, there was the lack of cell phone service from the time we left the Salt Lake City area until we landed in the Minneapolis airport nine days later. For your reading pleasure, I will now copy some excerpts from my daughter's vacation photo album/scrapbook about the trip:
........we finally arrived in Salt Lake City after many flight delays. It was the last city of civilization I would see for a long time! We were going to see the Great Salt Lake until we realized that it was a 2.5 mile trail walk that I wasn't going to do in the 90 degree heat......We ate at Lonestar, the only chain restaurant I saw the entire trip. We then drove to Idaho Falls, AKA The Middle of Nowhere. I was very happy to learn the hotel we were staying at had internet access..........We went to Cody, Wyoming. I am very glad I don't live there. We visited the Buffalo Bill Historical Center. It was so boring. My brother and I had a good time walking around discussing how they should make a show called, "Survivor - Buffalo Bill Center." My Dad was on his Blackberry (crackberry) the whole time we were there. Mom got mad because I didn't even know who Buffalo Bill was. Actually, I still don't really know who he is. We stayed at the Cody Cowboy Village, my favorite hotel EVER. There were two plasma TV's in our room.................we also went to the Cody Nite Rodeo. My Dad said it was a really famous rodeo (I had never heard of it). Surprisingly, I had a good time, although I did feel really sorry for all the kids in the show. They don't know what the good life is............One night it rained when we were near Mt. Rushmore. We were supposed to go to this lighting ceremony that got canceled. My siblings and I were all happy because we were able to relax at the hotel, drink hot chocolate and watch the premiere of High School Musical 2. ...........We went to Wall Drug Store.......it was so weird......I can't think of anything to write about it because it was so wack............we went to the Badlands, which was basically a bunch of rock formations...............I have never seen anything like the Rapid City airport. I think we were the only people there. They only had like three flights coming in........
And I'm really not trying to portray my kids as spoiled brats. Everyone had a wonderful time on what will probably be our last big trip all together as a family. It's just that the trip will probably be remembered as the one where we couldn't find an Applebee's.
This is hilarious, C. I am just appalled sometimes by my kids and how dependent they are on the accoutrements of 'civilized' society. One of our sons, the worst punishment we could ever give him is to take his cell phone away. FOR ONE DAY!
ReplyDeleteKinda pathetic, actually. . .
Hilarious! If my kids are anywhere without cable and the opportunity to watch any of the wrestling programs on TV each week, they're running down the list of who we can call who has a DVR and a willingness to record episodes for them. Apparently if you miss an episode, you're entirely out of the loop!
ReplyDeleteI am and forever will be a suburb girl. My aunt and uncle operate a large scale farm not far from me, and I'd spend weeks there in the summer. Swim in the pond, help with the animals. It was all good and wonderful until one day the cows got out when I was playing on the gravel drive and were heading my way at a steady clip, and I realized that things lived in the pond. After that, yep, I was pretty well grounded in strip malls and chain restaurants! Seriously, if I need toilet paper at 9 p.m., I like the security of knowing Target is 10 minutes away!
It's so funny to read this... My generation was probably the ones that started this! lol... I live and grew up in the suburbs- and went to a "hick" school- but the internet was just starting to grow in people's homes... and no one had cell phones.... they were car phones and they were the size of a small boombox! lol. and you only had one of those if you were one of the "rich" peple. lol
ReplyDeleteI love this..
and I thought my parents were from the "olden days". hehe
DJ - I hear you. Imagine 9 days without cell phone service. All I heard the week after we came back was, "My friends were soooo worried about me...." I kept telling her that none of my friends even noticed I was gone - LOL!
ReplyDeleteFADKOG - I'm picturing a herd of cows heading for little FADKOG....run, girl, run! And my Target now has a Starbucks located inside the premises. These marketing people know us so well!
Buttafly - just wait till your kids start making fun of your childhood or asking you what a VCR is. I will write a future post about my high school experience in our brand new computer lab (it was in a supply closet!)
OMG - that was the funniest thing I've read today!
ReplyDeleteI lost it when I read "Survivor - Buffalo Bill Center".
Most excellent post!
LOL!... nah, they're not spoiled, just a product of the new technological era. Gah, they don't even KNOW life w/o the internet and cell phones, do they?
ReplyDeleteDamn I'm old. lol
funny. i like the idea of camping from a hotel with a day hike for about a hour or two then a gourmet lunch and hot shower. yes this is suburb for us.
ReplyDeleteAlice - that's what I get for raising my kids on reality TV.
ReplyDeleteLB - considering my rule is you have to be 16 to get a cell phone, yes, they do know life without one and they won't let me forget that!
Savvy - that's about my idea of camping as well!
lawsie mercy! i saw many of those sights on a trip west 20 years ago before anyone had cell phones. and i loved it. oh, and i stayed in many tents along the way.
ReplyDeletethat surely is a funny tale of "deprivation." we've been fortunate enough to be involved in volunteering at a living historical farm that is run according to early 19th century standards so that has helped expose my kids to country living in all it's grimy glory. that's not to say they don't go into withdrawal if we don't have computer access for a day or more..but it is a start.
thanks for stopping by my place and saying hi so i could come find this gem. :)
ah come on, i grew up where people argued whether it was a crick or creeek. you knew it was summer when the farmer stirred up the liquid manure pit. yeee-haw!
ReplyDeleteLime - good to see you here too!
ReplyDeleteTaawd - you've come a long way, baby!