(This was forwarded to me by a dear male friend...............I can laugh at myself, but I refuse to take all of this lying down.............)
Spring Classes for Women at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVELOF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM
Class 1 - Up in Winter, Down in Summer - How to Adjust a Thermostat Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.Meets 4 wks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hrs beginning at 7:00 PM.
Rebuttal: Try being married to someone who's at work all day in a nice, climate-controlled atmosphere and then wonders why I'm aggravated when he turns the A/C off or the heat down to 60 degrees when he leaves for work.
Class 2 - Which Takes More Energy - Putting the Toilet Seat Down, or Bitching About It for 3 Hours? Round Table Discussion.Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.
Rebuttal: In almost 23 years of marriage, I have never once complained about this, even after falling in one time.
Class 3 - Is It Possible To Drive Past a Wal-Mart Without Stopping?--Group Debate.Meets=2 04 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.
Rebuttal: WHO willingly shops at Wal-Mart? I'm all about the Target.
Class 4 - Fundamental Differences Between a Purse and a Suitcase--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
Rebuttal: When spouse and children quit asking me to carry their cameras, wallets and cell phones in my purse, I will gladly downsize.
Class 5 - Curling Irons--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Bathroom Cabinet?Examples on Video.Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginningat 7:00 PM.
Rebuttal: Would you prefer burnt tubes of toothpaste and melted soap? Curling irons are left on the counter to cool down.......hello!
Class 6 - How to Ask Questions During Commercials and Be Quiet During the ProgramHelp Line Support and Support Groups.Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM
(I know ESPN & the Championship Game are not part of the Lifetime Movie Network but the game will be over in 2hrs)
Rebuttal: Games are NEVER over in 2 hours. There's always overtime, tie breakers or one more inning. Life sometimes needs to go on, despite your sporting event.
Class 7 - Can a Bath Be Taken Without 14 Different Kinds of Soaps and Shampoos?Open Forum.Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
Rebuttal: I'm a low maintenance gal, so this doesn't apply to moi.
Class 8 - Health Watch--They Make Medicine for PMS - USE IT!Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
Rebuttal: Maybe if spouse and the kids weren't so freakin' MEAN to me, I wouldn't have a need to begin some sort of drug addiction, huh??
Class 9 - I Was Wrong and He Was Right!--Real Life Testimonials.Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.
(course given by Nancy Pelosi)
Rebuttal: Seriously? I am never wrong; that's why he married me!
Class 10 - How to Parallel Park In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an Insurance Claim.Driving Simulations.4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.
Rebuttal: Speeding is more of my problem, and since I'm not a member of the "Good 'Ole Boys' Club," I seem to be the only one who gets ticketed in this house.
Class 11 - Learning to Live--How to Apply Brakes Without Throwing Passengers Through the Windshield.Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined
(or into the recently installed roll bars)
Rebuttal: I can honestly say that this sort of class would be more directed to my husband than to me. I understand what a safe driving distance is.
Class 12 - How to Shop by Yourself.Meets 4 wks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
Rebuttal: Shopping with a friend is a way to save gas and keep the Earth green. So there!
great rebuttals. Wonder why there isn't anything about going to the bathroom by themselves ;)
ReplyDeletegood rebuttals. i would add i am good at parallel parking....except for the behemoth truck, but normal sized cars and minivans, i'm a champ.
ReplyDeleteM- Yikes! Guilty as charged on that one :)
ReplyDeleteLime - You've always seemed to be the type who would not get flustered over parallel parking!
My my, someone's feeling a bit defensive! :-)
ReplyDeleteSilly stereotypes, bleh. Hardly worth rebuttals!
ReplyDeleteYou are as defensive and annoyed about the woman stereotypes as I am about the dumb, passive 'yes dear' stereotypes applied to men. :-)
ReplyDelete#2: You fell in once? I think we need to hear this story.
#6: You're right, it seems no sporting event is shorter than three hours anymore. Which is one reason I watch so few of them these days. But it's also the great thing about DVR: Pause. Answer question. Play.
Xavier - It's all in good fun, I'm sure.
ReplyDeleteAgent - I do hate the stereotypes.
FTN - The worst stereotype about men (to me) is that all they ever think about is sex. Yeah, I wish!
There's not much to the falling in story; I did and that was that. And we are not technologically advanced enough here for the DVR.
LOL, luv your rebuttals, funny stuff!!
ReplyDeleteI'm thinking you need to write up a piece that is Fall Classes for Men at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER.
I'm sure there's be MORE than 12. LOL ;)
I second the one about the AC. My husband is famous for this, especially when he doesn't tell me when he does this so I get home from work at 2:30 and wonder why it feels so hot in here?
ReplyDelete