Fun With Fat Boy

When we initially moved into our house, 20 years ago, we didn't have much experience feeding birds. Someone gave us a a birdfeeder as a housewarming gift and Husband hung it from a tree. It didn't take long for the squirrels to discover it and they would empty it in one sitting, literally sitting on the ledge of the feeder and gorging themselves. Husband then tried a pole with a metal baffler under it, but the squirrels would take a running leap and skid over the baffler and up to the feeder. Between the squirrel antics and the birds, I'm not sure which entertained College Daughter (who was a toddler at the time) more.

Our second winter in the house, Husband was determined to outwit the squirrels. I think he tried another baffler, and I remember our daughter standing at the window laughing at the squirrel who was sitting in the feeder once again. Husband got so angry, he opened the patio door, and yelled at the creature, "Get out of there you Fat Boy!!!!!" The squirrel calmly looked at Husband and continued munching away. Husband grabbed a walnut in a shell from our bowl of holiday nuts and threw it directly at the squirrel. He has very good aim and managed to hit the squirrel in the chest. The squirrel looked down at the nut on the ground, scampered down the pole, grabbed the nut and ran off with it. I don't think I ever laughed so hard in my life. Our daughter began calling every squirrel, "Fat Boy" from there on out and the name has stuck all these years with all our children.

Over the years, manufacturers have gotten better at baffling the squirrels. We now have three feeders and rarely does a squirrel manage to get into any of them. The Crisco on the pole helps too (Husband can be creative). Usually, the squirrels hang out under the feeders and grab what the birds drop.

We also throw old bread, torn into pieces for the blue jays. I'm not sure what Husband was thinking, but last week, he didn't bother to tear up the bread. He just threw some bread heels out the window. No sooner had he shut the window than a squirrel grabbed the slice and ran up a tree to perch and eat. He chewed that slice of bread like a typewriter carriage and managed to finish the entire slice in under three minutes. Husband commented, "He's going to be sorry later when he winds up constipated." Sweet revenge?

Ok Russ, admit it - pretty cute, huh??