Last November, I 'discovered' a television show that was already in its 6th season, Below Deck. For those of you who have never partaken in this form of reality, it's a show that follows around the people who work on a charter yacht in places like the Caribbean and South Pacific. Not something I ever thought I'd be interested in, but I was hooked. I managed to binge watch the 5 previous seasons over the last few months, while working out. It's a delightful combination of drama, romance, island scenery, chef created meals, and sarcastic crew making fun of the obnoxious rich people on board.
When the current season ended, I was like an addict looking for a fix. That's when I found that the captain and the first stew had both written books. Our library system came through for me. The first one I read was this:
A great primer on how to get into the yachting industry, told with the dry wit of Kate Chastain. She's a person that you either love or hate. Personally, I love her. As the chief stewardess, she works hard and expects the same from those who work for her. She's snarky, but what do you expect from someone stuck on a floating vessel for 6 weeks at a time?
However, her book was no match for the 'Stud of the Sea':
Everyone loves Captain Lee. He can only be described as a salty sailor with a heart of gold. On almost every episode, you are treated to one or two 'Captain Leeisms.' The reason I loved the book so much was for the nuggets amongst its pages. For your enjoyment, here are some of my favorites from the book:
(It was a) Classic case of dump truck mouth and wheelbarrow ass.
I was born at night, but it sure as hell wasn't last night.
I'd rather drag my dick through ten miles of broken whiskey bottles than set sail with George again.
You got your tit in a wringer.
What's the difference between God and a captain? God doesn't think he's a captain.
Earl could squeeze a nickel until the buffalo shit.
I'd rather have a sister in a whorehouse than a brother that owned a Sea Ray.
There is no dumbass vaccine.
Don't let your mouth write a check that your ass can't cash.
When the current season ended, I was like an addict looking for a fix. That's when I found that the captain and the first stew had both written books. Our library system came through for me. The first one I read was this:
A great primer on how to get into the yachting industry, told with the dry wit of Kate Chastain. She's a person that you either love or hate. Personally, I love her. As the chief stewardess, she works hard and expects the same from those who work for her. She's snarky, but what do you expect from someone stuck on a floating vessel for 6 weeks at a time?
However, her book was no match for the 'Stud of the Sea':
(It was a) Classic case of dump truck mouth and wheelbarrow ass.
I was born at night, but it sure as hell wasn't last night.
I'd rather drag my dick through ten miles of broken whiskey bottles than set sail with George again.
You got your tit in a wringer.
What's the difference between God and a captain? God doesn't think he's a captain.
Earl could squeeze a nickel until the buffalo shit.
I'd rather have a sister in a whorehouse than a brother that owned a Sea Ray.
There is no dumbass vaccine.
Don't let your mouth write a check that your ass can't cash.
Words to live by. Happy Weekend everyone!
I've seen a few episodes but never enough to get hooked. I knew someone who was crew on one of those Luxury yachts. Time off was a blast, but she said when the were working she was treated like crap.
ReplyDeleteI should watch, I normally like Reality TV.
I was hoping you were already a fan! Yes, it looks like time off being able to roam the islands would be grand, but otherwise, the job resembles indentured servitude.
DeleteDamn, George must have been a real pain in the butt for him to want to drag his pecker through that lol I'll still skip the "reality" tv though.
ReplyDeleteCapt. Lee's book was not about the tv show, but about his journey from welder in Michigan/Indiana to becoming a captain on the high seas. George was one of many alcoholic captains he dealt with while earning his stripes.
DeleteI've not heard of the reality show, Below Deck, but I can totally understand your addict and looking for a fix because that's exactly how I felt about the reality show, Project Runway. I never watched it while it was on cable because I don't own a television or ever had cable. I discovered the show on DVD and became addicted to renting all the previous seasons. I literally went on a two week binge of watching nothing but, Project Runway, every single evening. HA!
ReplyDeleteRunning Against the Tide sounds like a book I would LOVE! I laughed out loud at MANY of your favorites from the book. Will look for it at B&N.
Thanks for the recommendations. Have a faaaaabulous weekend, my friend! X
Isn't it fun to discover a new show and then binge AFTER it was originally aired? No waiting! Capt. Lee is a gem. See my above comment for what the book entailed. Super interesting and outside of my normal reads. Enjoy your weekend!
DeleteI have never heard of this show nor these books... but I often sail with a New Zealand chap who is a captain on such a yacht (a huge sailboat). He has a house here and comes in every few months and, as he must not get his fill of the sea, will race with us in much smaller boats!
ReplyDeletewww.thepulpitandthepen.com
The last season, the bosun was from NZ. One thing I like about the show is getting to 'know' people from all over the world.
DeleteNever heard of it. Is it available on NetFlix? I'm going to have to check it out, if not the books. I love some of Captain Lee's sayings. He does sound like a salty dog :)
ReplyDeleteIt is hard to take when a series you've been binge watching comes to an end. I'm on season 2, episode 13 of 13 Reasons Why. About 20 minutes left. I know there's a season 3 coming out sometime this year, but I know I'm going to be a bit "sad" when this one ends. I'm almost vowing not to start another series on NetFlix, but I don't see that happening.
Happy weekend to you too!
betty
It is On Demand for me, but I have Spectrum cable. My friend is obsessed with the Netflix show Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, so maybe you could check that one out! LOL
DeleteI've never seen it, I don't think it's ever been shown in the UK. It sounds most entertaining. Jenny and I love the property programmes in which people look for a new house or do up their existing one. "Dump truck mouth and wheelbarrow ass" is wonderful.
ReplyDeleteI like some of the property shows, too. Esp. the ones in Hawaii! Some of the best people on Below Deck have hailed from Great Britain. Ben, the chef, is fabulous!
DeleteI wish there was a dumbass vaccine, I know a few people who need it. LOL
ReplyDeleteI watched this show a while back because hubby liked it but I never got into it.
Ken has good taste! LOL! And there are a lot of dumbasses who are anti-vaxxers, so probably wouldn't work!
DeleteI often discover shows that have been around for ages. I was three years late to the "Lost" party and five years behind "The Wire." I figure it's better to get there eventually, rather than never at all!
ReplyDeleteThat was me with Breaking Bad, Everybody Loves Raymond, and King of Queens. Great characters in all of them. I tried Lost at the time, but it was too out there for me. I will have to look into The Wire.
DeleteI tend to find series I love and then binge watched. Worked my way through Jane the Virgin most recently and an Australian series, Offspring.
ReplyDeleteI talked to a social director (or whatever they are called) on a Barefoot Cruise in the West Indies and she told me the most unusual crew she'd been on was for a naked gay men's cruise.
For whatever reason, gay men seem to love yachting. Crazy business happens with unlimited disposable income on those charters.
DeleteOMG, I love the nuggets from the captain's book!
ReplyDeleteMy husband just searched to see if we could see the show "Below Deck" but we don't have cable and it's not on any streaming service we have.
Captain Leeisms are wonderful! Darn! I'm surprised it's not on most streaming services.
DeleteAhoy, there, Bijoux! I've heard of the show, but I haven't watched it yet. I like the captain's comments. Sounds a lot like my father!
ReplyDeleteI was thinking that some of them sounded like my Dad as well!
DeleteI read the book, but not watch the show.
ReplyDeletehave a great day